Top 5 Moscow nightclubs to hook up

The Top 5 Moscow Nightclubs to Hook Up with Russian Girls

"...so I told her let's get out of here, my apartment is really close."

"And what about her friend?"

"We wanted to take her with us but I think she was hooking up with another guy already. She was pretty wasted man. What a shame, that would have been even more epic."

"Yea man but still, that girl is waayyy hotter than the girls in the clubs here."

"I know, right? And look what she sent me yesterday..."

More...

Does that sound like a dialogue you would like to have after visiting Moscow?

If not, you should probably not be reading this site.

This dialogue sounds all too familiar to me. And if you come to Moscow, there's a pretty good chance that you too will have a good story to tell later.

There's just this little issue:

You need to know where to go and what to do to meet nice Russian girls.

Today I'm going to help you out with the first part.

Pretty much any sane guy with a pair of functioning balls dreams about coming to Moscow and hooking up with a hot Russian girl.

Now if you want to get the top notch girls in Moscow, you are going to have to do a bit more than just show up with your foreign passport.

But if you just want to party and enjoy a jolly good time (and maybe more), then get pen and paper out now.

Because here are the Top 5 Clubs for Hooking Up with a Russian Girl in Moscow:

Disclaimer: this is not about where the hottest girls are but where it's the easiest for a foreigner to meet someone. Neither am I promising you that you're going to get laid left and right. If you're socially awkward and have no game, don't come running back to me telling me that I am full of shit.


Gipsy

The Gipsy Club is sort of the face of Moscow, at least for foreigners and tourists. I think the concentration of non-Russians is easily the highest among all the nightclubs in Moscow. Funny enough, this is also the only club, besides designated expat places, where I've ever met girls that are not from Russia.

Gipsy is perfect to have a fun night out in a loud and pumping nightclub with cool music and decent interior. Their door isn't hard anymore nowadays, so you should have no problems getting in, especially if you (know how to dress).

There's always a ton of people there. Most of them lean on the younger side and drink a lot. Especially if you're under 25, you shouldn't find it too hard to have some fun in there.

How to meet someone

If you're into dancing, go and do your thing on the packed dancefloor. Older cats like me will prefer the front part of the club where you can actually have a conversation. Remember that most girls are in the 18-23yo range and a lot of them get pretty hammered as well. It's also much less posh than a lot of other Moscow clubs.

Verdict

Come if you drink a lot and want to hook up with a young Russian girl.

Icon

The Icon Club Moscow is the better and high-end version of a big nightclub, without being so fancy that it will break your bank. Guys have to drop a minimum at the door that you can use for drinks. If it’s at least two of you, it will be only about 2,000 Rubles per person though (~ 30$).

You’ll immediately notice the difference between Gipsy and Icon: girls are not quite as young (but still mostly under 25) and dolled up. Heels are club policy and they turn away girls that don’t wear them...good for us!

Icon is also a bit table-heavier and (getting a table) in there is always well worth the money. I’ve done it multiple times and it never failed me, hehe. That way you have pretty much no competition anymore because most other guys are either young and inexperienced or older and a bit misplaced in Icon.

How to meet someone:

There are multiple areas with different music, so you can always roam from one to the other. Depending on which areas are open, you also have access to different types of restrooms. And some of those are convenient and private...just saying!

Verdict:

Come if you like girls in heels and a fancy show with a lot of glitter.

Jagger Bar

The Jagger Bar Moscow is a great option for those of you that don’t want to deal with teenagers but still like a high-energy option.

Unlike some of the options on “Red October”, Jagger is a 21+ club and actually enforces that if the guests look too young. You still get the whole range from people in their twenties.

What’s great about Jagger is that it has a super loose and unpretentious party vibe. Some girls are dolled up, others not so much, but everyone comes to Jagger for a good time and party.

I wrote in the review how it’s somewhere between a real club and a party bar and that totally works in your favor. Jagger often pulls people that “don’t go to nightclubs” but let loose that one time when they do. If you’re clever you can put one and one together here...

How to meet someone:

In Jagger it is harder to not meet someone actually. In winter the outside area is more chill and better to talk to people, in summer it's the other way round. You can also go for a smoke in front of the club or in the smoking area (in winter). No one comes here to stay alone so you really can't go wrong with either option.

Verdict:

Come if you want a crazy good time and maybe hook up with a Russian girl that is not a teenager anymore.

Tipsy

I wouldn’t say the Tipsy Club is off the beaten path but it’s not as well-known for sure. The reason is that it’s a nightclub version of a dive bar with out of control teenagers and lots and lots of alcohol. Yes, even more so than in the places before.

The Tipsy Club is what happens when you put lots of horny teenagers together in a hall and give them lots of cheap booze. The club is neither pretty, nor fancy and definitely not sophisticated. But the atmosphere is pretty good and you will see all kinds of “stuff” happen there. You will only leave empty-handed and without any success if you choose to do so.

How to meet someone:

My guess is that not a lot of the teenagers speak English but that probably doesn’t matter after all the booze. You can dance like an idiot or check out the smoking area or just stand at the bar until someone drunkenly stumbles into you and makes a move on you. In Tipsy you don't need good game to actually meet someone.

​Verdict:

Come if you are under 21 and want to get smashed with 2,000 Rubles.

Miks

The Miks Club is your best chance if you have struck out by the time all the “normal” clubs are closing. It is one of the most popular afterparty clubs in Moscow and definitely has “that kind of” reputation.

Most people are either drunk, high or something else. It’s also full with good-looking women even though a lot of them are unattainable because they are either paid to be there or leave early. But fear not, even at 9am in the morning people come in to get fucked up even more.

If you really want to force it, Miks is a great option. You do get the whole variety of ages and styles, even if most girls in Miks have resting bitch faces.

How to meet someone:

My tip is to be really aggressive with approaching girls since by that time no one really gives a damn anymore. Roll the dice and make your intentions clear quickly. The crowd in Miks is not "good", if you know what I mean.

Verdict:

Come if you are trying to hook up with a Russian girl until you physically can’t take it any more.

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